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July 1 Weekly Update: Changing Roles

Bottom Line, Up Front

  • Upcoming key dates or action items for families 
  • Changing family and student roles 

Dear parents and families of incoming students,

It’s Tuesday, which means we have our weekly update for new families. Let’s get to it!

Upcoming key dates or action items for families 

Here’s what you should know this week.

  • The Student Health Insurance waiver and enrollment forms should be open starting on July 2:
    • All students enrolled in at least one on-campus credit are automatically charged and are required to enroll in or waive the Student Health Insurance by September 15, with the exception of international students who are automatically enrolled. 
    • If your student does not complete either form, they will be automatically enrolled in the plan and will be responsible for the premium amount ($1,421) charged to their student account, regardless of any other coverage they may have. 
    • Please note that the waiver and enrollment forms must be completed annually. This is not a task just for newly-enrolled students. All students of all years must enroll or waive coverage.
    • We are planning to send a separate email to all undergraduate families with the insurance link once it is open. Look for that in your inbox.
  • Fall tuition notification will be issued July 2; Tuition must be paid in full or covered by a payment plan by August 1. The following step-by-step guides are available (remember, your student has to grant you access as a third-party in Workday):
  • The enrollment period for GradGuard tuition insurance will also open on July 2. You will be able to enroll in or decline coverage through the QuikPay payment portal, which you can access by going through the payment prompts in Workday Student Financials. The plan ensures up to a 100% refund throughout the semester for tuition, fees, housing, and meal plan charges (up to $50,000.00) in case of withdrawal due to accident, illness, mental health, death of a payer, or loss of employment of a payer.  
  • Family Weekend event registration begins next Tuesday (July 8) on the Family Weekend website at 10 a.m. Here is the tentative schedule for the weekend:
  • On Friday, the 26th, Registration and check-in (i.e., packet pickup) for Family Weekend will begin at 10 a.m. We will host our annual Deacon Family Festivities that afternoon, followed by the Night of Student Entertainment. There will be several dining options available both on and off-campus for your dining pleasure. 
  • On Saturday, the 27th will host a variety of pre-game activities, which include access to the student tailgate area before the Wake Forest vs. GA Tech football game. Access to the student tailgate area will require the Family Weekend credential and a game ticket. 
  • On Sunday, the 28th, we conclude the weekend with a farewell brunch (tickets sold separately). Other activities and experiences such as tours, lectures, presentations, and the like are currently being planned for Friday as well.
  • More information will be available soon at familyweekend.wfu.edu. For now, mark your calendars and plan to order your event tickets on July 8th.
  • For those still looking for hotel accommodations, please peruse the Visit Winston Salem website for current hotel listings in the area; also consider Airbnb, VRBO, etc. in the Piedmont Triad area (i.e., Greensboro, High Point, and Winston-Salem). 
  • We look forward to having you with us in September!

Changing student and family roles

  • For most of us, we went through the K-12 years with our kids’ schools telling us “parental involvement equals student success.” So it would be reasonable for families to think that stays the same in college, but it does not. At the college level, students are expected to take on the responsibility of the day-to-day management of their lives, their academics, their friend group, etc. We as parents and loved ones are asked to shift into a different parenting mode.
  • Family members are still incredibly important – you are the key source of love and support for your student! In order to grow, college students need to make their own decisions. While in high school you might have been in a manager or director role with your students (where you provided directions and answers), in college it is more helpful to adopt a consultant role (where you serve as a sounding board to prompt their thinking, but allow your students to find their own answers).
  • Having role clarity can assist with the transition to college for students and families alike. Here are some suggestions on student vs. family roles.
    • Your student should:
      • Choose their classes and major
      • Make friends
      • Join campus organizations
      • Handle day to-day needs and decision-making
      • Protect their WFU login and password and not share it with anyone else (including their parents/families)
      • Be the one to work with faculty or campus offices when they have questions or need assistance
      • Share feedback or concerns with appropriate faculty or offices
      • Navigate issues or conflicts with friends, roommates, etc.
      • Troubleshoot basic issues (e.g., finding a ride to the airport, filling out paperwork, submitting residence hall work orders, etc.)
      • Research areas of interest (e.g., classes to take, potential majors, where to study abroad)
    • Parents and families should:
      • Provide a loving base of support 
      • Listen more, talk less
      • Give them space to grow
      • Be a sounding board
      • Prompt them with questions, but do not supply answers or directions
    • Help only if it’s truly needed (see our Stop, Drop, and Roll framework)
  • The bottom line: In most cases, your Deac should be the one to do the work, make the call, ask the question, research the classes to take, give the feedback, etc. Our students need space to learn and grow, whereas your problem solving skills are already well-developed. This is their time to find their own way, make their own decisions (and mistakes!), and develop independence.
  • The Advice for New Families page of the New Students website has lots of information that can be helpful in preparing your family for the transitions that college will bring.

Parting thoughts

My husband and I navigated these waters when our ‘27 student enrolled at NC State two years ago. I remember our ‘27 asserting their independence and asking me to stand back and let them handle the summer checklist for school – and how I felt like I wasn’t on top of all the details in the way I might have liked to be. So I know firsthand that finding the balance between your soon-to-be college student’s independence and what we want to know/do as parents and loved ones is not easy 🙂

We will continue sending weekly messages to our new P’29 and transfer families throughout the summer. In case you missed last week’s message, you can view our archive here.

With best wishes,

Betsy Chapman, Ph.D. (‘92, MA ‘94)
Executive Director of Family Communications

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